brownsugatou

People always ask me…
Where do I get my laughter?
My sense of humor?
And smiles for miles?
Even when facing adversity…

I get it from my sister.

God knew I needed you
I wasn’t even a year old
Before you came on the scene
Yep 10 point 5 months apart
Might as well have been twins

Due to our close knit ages
We started preschool together.
I remember you crying for Mama
And me comforting you by saying,
"It’s gonna be alright Lilly!"

Mama dressed us alike
From our early beginnings
Until we proudly wore
Our caps and gowns together…

Sadly that’s where I used to think
Our story (Climiell and Lillian) ended.
Me off to college and you
Starting your beautiful family,
Each of your children
Lookin’ just like you,
Just like US!
Ben, Roberta,
Me, and you!

I just knew our bonding had died
One day…
But did I really know this for sure?

At ages 5 and 6
We were play fighting.
You kicked my first tooth out
With your foot and we laughed hysterically about it.
Thank God my tooth was already loose…

Together we damn near
Burned down our Aunt Climiell’s
House playing with matches.
No one told us we could not
Cover up a black burn stain on a
Light blue carpet
And try to lie about it…

And what about the time,
During the week or father’s funeral,
We fed 13 kids and 2 adults
(Our older sister, her three kids
And her friend and her 10 kids)
With 80 Chicken McNuggets?

Who would have predicted
Laughter from the McDonald’s employees
Because of our large order?
And then you cursing them out
For selling one of our 20 pieces
To another customer
Thus holding up our entire order.
Folks was hungry…

And I remember when Mama
Purchased that generic walkman
From an “off-brand” catalog
That had two jacks for the
Two headphones?
We were NOT technologically
Handicapped back then
I was glad to be joined at the hips
Musically with you…

Now, we may not share
Our deepest darkest secrets,
Talk on the phone weekly,
Our give each other advice…

But I knew when you called me last year
And all I could hear was that familiar
Uncontrollable and contagious laughter.

The one where you can’t
Even get your words out,
The laughter that made US
Cry so hard over the years -
ONLY for you to finally say,

“My wig… (insert laughter)
Fell (insert hard laughter) off …
(insert laughter and tightening of the muscles)
At church today!”

Sis, I knew then,
And I now know for sure
That our bond never died.

Thank you for the laughter.

Dedicated to my sister,
Lillian Marie-Buffin
I love you Sis.

Harder I Fall/We Fail

For all the reasons,
I wanted to remain friends,
Protect my heart,
Enclosed by a fence
And challenge my faith...
I thank you.

I thank you for
Teaching me to kiss,
Wounded lips,
And wake up with,
Unavailable you...
I thank you.

Copyright 2009
C. Thomas a.k.a brownsugatou

Tears so forceful.

Come pouring dryly.
Yet so swiftly.
That they miss me.

Dry heave.
Tight chest.
I’m a mess.

Blank thoughts.
Full mind.
Unstructured thinking.

I want to.
I got to.
If not for me…
Why me?

Chosen?
Maybe.

Thoughts translated.
Put down on paper.

Do you see?
Our commonality.

So together we.
On bended knee…

We pray.
And stay hopeful.

It’s not just me.

Copyright 2009

Hailing from Dallas, TX, spoken word artist Jason Mars is ready to start a movement that also encompasses a group of other artists identifying themselves as the "New Talented Tenth". And his riveting spoken word piece "I Write America" (see above) tells you why this young brother will make his mark in the spoken word arena and beyond. But just who is Jason Mars? Come on, follow along... and let him tell you in this brief Q & A session.

Q: How would you describe your style of spoken word?
A: My style is actually an even mixture of poetry and spoken word. For every performance piece I write a piece that can be read by an audience.

Q: You mentioned that you just got serious about the impact of words. What inspired you to write poetry and get into spoken word? When did you make the transition from just writing to take yourself and your work seriously as an artist
A: I have been writing for 6yrs since I was 15, I just started performing when I realized that I could captivate an audience. The opportunity to move crowds with words that I concocted was incredible to me. Writing was an outlet at a young age age and as I wrote more and more I developed a better grasp of word play and skills to structure poems. I just recently took it serious when I started to get good feedback.

Q: What venues have you recently performed at? Any future shows planned
A: I performed for the first time at Sankofa in Dallas.... I am moving to California to set up a couple shows that I can frequent. I am looking to put on my own shows in California in the next 3 months.

Q: Where can spoken word fans see your work?
A: The best place to find my work is youtube.com/jadenallen

Q: What projects are you currently working on?
A: Future projects include a weekly poetry show, an art/poetry fusion
show (insane) a book of poetry that will include the reasons behind
the poems so that I stay true to my work.

Q: Can you elaborate more on your "movement" and explain who the "new" Talented Tenth are?
A: The movement is a group of individuals who have a message to share and do so through the arts movement: poetry/spoken word, painting,sketching etc... The young anti-apathy movement. Talented tenth is the spin off of the movement from the days of the Harlem Renaissance.

Q: What was the inspiration behind your spoken word piece "I Write America".
A: "I Write America" was inspired by life... I just wanted to break down the colors of the flag and give them meaning. An honest meaning in my
opinion.

Q: One year ago you were...?
A: One year ago I was writing and waiting on everyone's approval until I realized that if it is truly from a genuine place then people will
flock to it.

Q: Ten years from now you will...?
A: Ten years from now I will have published at least 3 books, written 4 plays, 3 screen plays, and will be known for contributing something positive to my community and leading by example.

Q: Why do you feel it's important to share your work with others?
A: I feel like it is important to share my work because I have the
ability to creatively convey messages and express the emotions of my
people, my generation.

Jason Mars has spoken. But he ain't done yet.
www.youtube.com/jadenallen

Copyright 2009

Press Release: LOVE JONES AND LOVE POEMS THE TOUR 2009

"Let me be your revolutionary flame
The liberated lion you wake up next to
and exchange warm salutations with.
I yearn to feel the fire of your kiss
as we build, debate, agree to disagree
while walking freedom's beautiful path"....

Excerpt from "Let Me Be Your Revolutionary Flame" Copyright 1999
Christopher D. Sims a.k.a. UniverSouLove

To not allow yourself to enjoy the work of this talented and gifted spoken word artist would be a sin. UniverSouLove is now available for features and is currently embarking on his own one man show, spoken word tour - Love Jones and Love Poems the Tour for 2009. For booking please e-mail: booking@universoulovethepoet.com

The true essence of hip hop. You can't help but to dance. So just do it!

Jonesin'...(Take 125th St. and Detour Pass Amazing)

I be Jonesin'.
Jonesin' for his poetical words
That be flowin'.

Page after page,
He performs lyrical stunts
And rhyming acrobatics.

As I sip on the soul of
His verbal aphrodisiacs.

When his poetry kisses my skin,
Nibblin' at the earlobes of this
Black womb(man),
It leaves me breathless.
His metaphors, words, and verbs,
Got me on some next shhhhhh...

I be Jonesin'.
Jonesin for his poetical words,
They be flowin'.

An ordained listener.
He's been captivated by the
Beauty of our essence.
For stretches of long years...
May I suggest you absorb
"Black Women Cry Purple Tears".

So can you understand,
The beautiful state of bliss that I am in?

The reasons why I cherish
Each well crafted verse?
Originating from a gifted mind.

My heart is connected.
And forever mesmerized by his
Oratorical Universe.

I be Jonesin'.
Jonesin' for his poetical words.
Yeah, I be floatin'.

Copyright 2009
C. Thomas
a.k.a. brownsugatou

Heart races.
I'm scared.
Breathing shortened.
Gone?
Nah, it's still there.

Thank God I'm me.
But afraid of what
YOU want, need, and think
I might be.

Pure hesitancy
I smell.
The joy and possible
Satisfaction I bring to you,
You inhale.

Still I'm runnin'.
Runnin' from a ball of emotions.
These chains of irrationality.
This weight of anxiety,
As I imagine me leave
My complacency.

But what if I walk with Him
And believe?

Increase my faith and
Supress my doubts?

Choke back these tears
And cuddle up with victory?

Focus on the amazing things
He sees in me?

Nothin'.
This poem hasn't happened yet.
'Cause I'm still runnin'.

Copyright 2009
C. Thomas
a.k.a. brownsugatou

Actually it's Friday, and I am off from work. Plus I get paid mid-week. However this O'Jays classic never fails to brighten my weekend. Enjoy! Thanks to LUVINHAPPINESS at YouTube.

Poetry

Poetry,
I know it's ME
But it ain't calling me...

Pulling me, restraining me
To compose a verse

Wait a minute...
I'm still rewritin' the "rehearse".

That flows like...
"I am"...
"To be..."
"If I were..."

But I end up with...
A lonely rhyme,
A blank page,
And ink that's gunnin' for "first"

Poetry,
I know it's ME...
But it ain't calling me.

Just ranting my but off, because I have writer's block.

Copyright 2009
C. Thomas a.k.a brownsugatou

Nope, don't call it a come back! Just tellin' it like it is. @mosdefaqueen a.k.a. brownsugatou has been slacking, not posting, not being one with her words or her poetry on this blog. So just call it laziness (although I do have a life offline) and let me post something up on the blog before the post dates become wide and far. I'm not trying to take this to 2010 my friends... so I give you MosDef to fill in the gaps.

Blessings on this Sunday afternoon to MacDaddy at http://www.daddybstrong.blogspot.com/! "Is it the way that I say my name?... Sotomayor... Or the way I influence this political game?... Sotomayor!" I hear you MacDaddy I hear you. Peace and Blessings. - brown




MosDef -"Flowers" YouTube Link

Tuesday May, 19th was Global Blogging Day of Action for Troy Davis. Brown missed out but is still getting the word out via guest blogger (but strong supporter of my page) Mac Walton a.k.a. The Daddy.

Read.
Absorb.
And above all take action against this injustice!




Troy Davis and a fight to hear birds sing and smell flowers once again.

By Mac Walton a.k.a., The Daddy
Source: daddyBstrong.blogspot.com

This early morning, with dew still all around, The Daddy got out of bed, made coffee, and sipped it out on his patio. Then, with java still in hand, he strolled leisurely around his backyard, walking on fresh green grass, listening to the birds and smelling the flowers.

Then the image of a round, speckled-faced Troy Davis came into his mind--This almost nerdy looking guy who, had he not been arrested and convicted, could have been a smart lawyer defending someone in court, who could have been sitting behind a desk as someone’s community librarian, or who could have been a neighbor walking around his own backyard just before getting ready for work.

This is the same Troy Davis whose life was shot back into ultimate survival mode when the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals refused to hear his case, pleading technical issues like Troy not filing his appeal papers on time years ago, knowing that the state of Georgia did not provide him a lawyer to make him aware of his rights and to help him to file the papers anyway.

Larry Cox, executive director for the U.S. segment of Amnesty International, put it this way: "Today's decision is an affront to basic human rights and demonstrates that legal technicalities have become a dangerous excuse to undermine justice. Yet again the courts are placing procedural obstacles over the critical issue of innocence, and, by extension, the value of human life. The bar for admitting evidence has been raised to such a level that no one arguing his innocence would be able jump that hurdle."

This is the same Troy Davis who, if the state of Georgia has its way, will be executed for a crime he probably never committed, an alleged crime where there was no weapon found, no evidence connecting him to the crime, and where 7 of the 9 witnesses who, under intimidation originally said Troy Davis did the crime, have now recanted their stories. Indeed, some have pointed to one of the two remaining so-called eyewitnesses, saying he did the crime.

This is the same Troy Davis who not only has already spent 17 years for a crime he probably didn’t commit, but who will die out of a few state judge’s choice to value state technicalities such as the time he first filed for appeal over a human being’s life and some white Georgians view that some man—no, some black man—must die for the killing of a white off-duty police officer—even if he is innocent.

This is the same Troy Davis who not only can't grab a cup of coffee and walk around his backyard; he can't even leave his cell.

A number of bloggers have been asking that you fight for Troy Davis. Two of the leading bloggers to ask you to do so have been SJP over at Sojourner’s Place and the Villager over at Electronic Village. Along with Amnesty International, they have helped to keep this issue and Troy Davis alive. They made you aware of Troy’s plight and updated you every step of the way in this ever-winding twist of injustice.

Now, The Daddy is joining them and others to blog for Troy, for justice… for an America that does not sanction the killing of human beings.

The Daddy is blogging to say don’t give up; you still have time; and, for your sake as well as his, keep up the fight to keep.

And here’s what you can do:

1. E-mail or fax Gov. Perdue’s office. Go to this Amnesty International’s site (Amnesty International - Troy Davis). It has an email or fax letter you can use to send to the governor asking him to support clemency for Troy Davis.

2. Phone Georgians for Alternatives to the Death Penalty (GADP) at: (404)876-6113. Let them know you are with them all the way in this fight against the death penalty; and

3. E-mail Troy to let him know that, no matter what, you will stay in the fight, that you will continue the fight against the death penalty, and that, through this fight, he will always be remembered. You can reach him at: troy@aiusa.org

Listen, wouldn’t it be a great day if Troy, like The Daddy, wakes up one morning, takes his cup of java out to his backyard and just walks around the yard on green grass, listening to the birds sings and smelling the roses in his garden?

Wouldn’t that be something?

Mac Walton

Blog address: http://daddybstrong.blogspot.com/
E-mail: culturaldynamics@msn.com

A self-respecting King inspired me to write this poem . I've shared this piece online over at www.okayplayer.com, Facebook and with some of my offline friends. A friend asked me over at Facebook "Women just want to be respected right?" in response to this poem. My answer to that was respected and for some women "corrected' on how to be respected. Wasn't my thoughts when this poem was initially written...I guess that's why I knew there would always be a part (2), hence the title.
A certain celebrity got me to thinking about the issue of respect. I wrapped my eyes around his words or his tweets on Twitter the other night as I witnessed him sell himself sexually to women in order to market his CD on Twitter. Happens all the time but it was just something uncomfortable about a celebrity telling women, fans, and the men who follow you on Twitter that you are "horny" (exact word used). Has a ton of followers and all the time I'm thinking "this is T_ _ _ _ _ to the em-f _ _ _ _ _ N and he can saaaaang!" Just puzzled as to why he felt the need to do that on Twitter. So much craziness online. To that celebrity..."Physical Presents" can be unraveled and tasted tastefully and still be satisfying. I think your fans love and respect you because you are you! Kings AND Queens...... respect and love each other totally. Take the time to slowly unravel each other. Enjoy part (1)!
Peace and Blessings,
brown-

Physical Presence vs. Physical Presents (1)

Hey you,
Why you fixin’ yo’
Eyes
On
Me?

I’m amazing I know.
But you gaze at what I
Don’t prefer you to see.
(At least not initially)

To zone in on
This beautiful creation,
This mother,
This Black Goddess,
This Queen!
That gave birth to “we”.
I set the boundaries
When it comes to visual
Intimacy with me.

My eyes are
Up
Here
Boo.

I see the Professor did
Not
School
You
On how to properly
“Kiss” my black skin,
The skin of black women.

You didn’t even notice
Or even care that
I’m infinitely sexy
Up
Top
Too.

Or maybe,
You
Just
Don’t
Possess the stamina
And required patience
To tactfully seek and
Unravel the bow
Of
My pres-ence,
My es-sence,
My pres-ents,
My es-sence.

© 2009 C. Thomas a.k.a. brownsugatou

brownsugatou
A black woman and her poetry

Baby mama blues, single mama blues, worker bee blues.... who am I kidding? I don't have much to write really. Although my frustration, my desire to vent, to squelch my anger, led me to this laptop to this blog to these typed letters. Thought I was going to write a new poem entitled "Unleashed" because that's just how I'm feeling right now. A strong desire to unleash my emotions, feelings and thoughts. My Tweet this morning said "I'm preparing for the monster that consumes me - work."... Next time I know not to lay the ground work for a negative day. A situation at work IS what sparked my current mood... and I wish it would just go away, however I know I have to think this out in a rational way and remain focused. The hell with that too... brown is just in need of a hug. Have you had your hug today?
Oh wow... before I could hit "Publish Post" my son just handed me an I-was-suppose-to-give-you-this-card-on-Mother's-Day-card-but-didn't... and it's one of those singing cards... the song is entitled "I Still Hear Mama Praying for Me" - by Chester D. T. Baldwin. He (my son) is my #1 fan and I am his #1 fan! That's all that matters right now... Have you had your hug today? Peace and Blessings, brown-.

I changed the title of my blog over a week ago to "A black woman, her poetry, and then some". This is another "and then some" post or a Non-Poetic post as I've entitled such posts all along. This rookie blogger is learning and changing as I am sure a lot of beginners do. My goal is to still share my poetry and absorb the world and that includes you! Now back to business...

"I don't want to gain the whole world and lose my soul." If it's Sunday, there are times when I relax after breakfast and check out some of the gospel videos on BET. Gospel music and videos have evolved over the years. (refreshing to see a lot of G-Rated videos on BET) However, I admit there are times when I don't quite know for sure if I am watching a gospel video or not. But, music is music - sometimes. Just wanted to share this great video I happened to see today that includes a biblical message. "Lose My Soul" by Toby Mac featuring the man responsible for influencing a lot of the changes that we see in gospel music/videos today, Kirk Franklin and former American Idol contestant Mandisa. Enjoy!

Brownsugatou is joining other bloggers around the nation to bring awareness to world hunger. Go to http://www.bloggersunite.org/, save a badge, head right back to your blog and post up! I am sharing some links to websites that address solutions to world hunger and a new poem I wrote entitled Sacrifice in honor of today's online event. I am also including a link to an article written a while back by Dave Newhouse about Mary Ann Wright or "Mother Wright". If you are from Oakland, CA my hometown, I don't think I have to say anymore. When I think of someone dedicating their life to feed the souls of others Mother Wright is the first person that I think of. Enjoy!

Action Against Hunger
World Hunger Year
1-866-3-HUNGRY
Mother Wright


Sacrifice

Impoverished is impoverished is impoverished.
Whether you are white, black, or "wrong"
Or purple, pink and "strong".

My hunger, your hunger
Is our hunger.
What? You thought it was a color?

A lower rung on the "ladder"?
A dirty hand attached to a
Tin cup on the corner?
An electronic food stamp?
Me passing' up two meals for another?

It is being "food insecure".
(Thanks U.S.D.A.)
It is earning a living with the undesirable
need to beg, borrow, and go without-
Food or PG &E?
Food or bus fare?
Food or health?
What will my choice be today?

Work shoes or no food?
Co-pay or no food?
Stay employed AND go hungry?
Stay employed AND go hungry?
Stay employed AND go hungry?

What
Will
My
Choice
Be
Today?

Sacrifice.

(c) 2009
C. Thomas a.k.a. brownsugatou

Check, check, check it out if you are near your computer and love the art of spoken word or poetry. Hey, maybe you'll decide to host your own show on Blog Talk Radio one day too. Pam Osbey is a spoken word artist, poet, author, enterpreneur, workshop facilitator, and hosts her own show "Literary Pizzazz" on Blog Talk Radio. You can visit her website, read her biography and check out her books at her webswite at Osbey Books.

Still celebrating National Poetry Month Pam Osbey will feature another great spoken word artist whom I've mentioned on my blog before, Christopher D. Sims a.k.a. UniverSouLove. I rock on to his underground classic, and it is underground, "1987". If you are a hip hop fan you can't help it. Check out his sounds at his myspace website. Below is the detailed information regarding the show. Remember you must register with Blog Talk Radio first, log in, and then call in if you have questions or comments. Peace and Blessings for now folks.

Blog Talk Radio Feature
Join UniverSouLove on
Pam Osbey's Blog Talk Radio Show
"Literary Pizzazz"
Monday, April 27th, 2009
8 p.m. Central Time
Call in number is: (646) 478-5460
8 pm Central Time

Pam Osbey's Blog Talk Radio

This may be old news to more experienced bloggers, and photo diggers however it is new to this unexperienced blogger. Picnik is a great online photo editor. Simply put - it's free, user friendly, registration is optional, and there is no need to download anything to your computer. Basically you can edit the photo and save it to your computer. An upgraded version of Picnik can be purchased for a nominal fee. Check out the website if you need the technical specifics to be totally convinced that Picnik is the right online photo editor for you. I'm digging it and I kind of got funky with it too. (but still learning) However, there was no reason for me to smile. See below. Peace and Blessings!

Widgetbox rocks! That's about all I have to say. Really cool site for the not so web savvy blogger such as myself.

I can't even blame this on a writer's block. Feedburner, Twitter (I'm tolerating this new gadget), SEO (search engine optimization), declined by BlogCatalog.com, Brownsugatou just realized that she has a long way to go in terms of sharing her poetry and mingling with others on the world wide web! Yes, I am going bananas but I am not one to give up. This is unlike posting poetry on a forum at a cool site and getting responses. From what I have read briefly online, it takes time, energy, persistence, quality content, some SEO savvy and you gotta post, post, post to draw traffic to your web blog and maintain readership. But it's okay I find that I do lack time to devote to this weblog. But the small amount of time I spend "managing" this blog is sometimes therapeutic for me - writing new poems and absorbing my old pieces. But I have some lessons to learn... Generating Blog Traffic 101 and Maintaining Readership for Dummies. Some web company would be nice! However, I will be one of few bloggers to say that I will be patient with myself and with the traffic that might eventually trickle over to this blog! In the meantime, MacDaddy (please check out his informative blog at www.daddyBstrong.blogspot.com) maybe I'll enter the Guinness Book of World Records for having just one reader/follower! I don't listen do I?

Sometimes I have to "write now, right now". And sometimes it's short and sweet. Just gettin' out my feelings here. If you feel me please let me know. Enjoy!

Something Viral

How can something viral
Yet so vicious,
Be so delicious?

'Cause I feel teased
From within
These thoughts...
I'm feeling
A "good" sin?

The thought of
Never, not.
Not, never.
I can't comprehend.

How can something viral
Yet so vicious,
Be so delicious?

Damn!

Copyright 2009
C. Thomas
a.k.a. brownsugatou

Communication. Communication. Communication. So integral in relationships whether they are blossoming or have stood the test of time. I'll be the first to admit that I am both strong and sometimes fail at communicating - but I don't mind learning and trying something different. This next piece is a definite result of trying something different. I wrote it and shared it with the person that my feelings were directed at... and wow talk about a cup overflowing with a river of good vibes. Enjoy!

He Don't Understand.

Really he doesn’t.
How it’s hard to.
Put one’s vulnerability on the line.
When I sacrifice time.
My son and mine’s.

No he doesn’t understand.
How I appreciate what we share.
Yes it’s divine.

If I could give 100% and then some.
I would.
I try.
And I do.

No he doesn’t’ understand.
I’m often the target of Baby Daddy attacks.
I work my 9-5 plus nine.

I give and get some time.
When its given.
I choose selectively

When I get it.
I take it.
And it’s usually the best damn.
Two minute vacation

No he doesn’t understand.
That I really do appreciate.
The new friendship.
The sharing.
The giving.
The listening.
The laughter.
And the sound of creativity.

Friendship.
Sharing.
Giving.
Listening.
Laughter.
The sound of creativity.

This is the beautiful sum of all my negativity?

Then, yeah, the King will understand…
the Queen is just having one of her moments.

Copyright 2009
C. Thomas a.k.a. brownsugatou

Earlier this evening on my Facebook page I wrote...

I am me and not "society". Words to some poetry are brewing here... Write Now, Right Now! is my motto because I'm a fool for impatience sometimes. One day I will be a patient wordsmith like UniverSouLove, gifted like Taalam, and speak eloquently like T.D. Jakes. That's not the poem, but I'm just sayin'...

Later...
So good to be me, so good to be free, and not choked by what others might want me to be. This piece actually started with me and a funky drum beat in my head. I don't know lately I've been writing pieces to my own mental music. I experienced these same feelings when I wrote "Can I Love You and Hip Hop Too?" (see below) and "My Black Man" (which I have not shared with the world yet). However, I am still a P.I.P. a Poetess In Progress... enjoy!

I AM ME, NOT “SOCIETY”

Silky fine hair
You can take it.

Man made nose?
You can run with it.

Friday’s facade?
Please kill it.

Intelligence?
I’ll freak it.

Mountainous bosom?
I was born with it.

Come inside your mold?
I ain’t havin’it.

My twisted kinky hair?
Always down with it.

Lumpy thick hips?
Can you handle it?

Social expectations?
You know what you
Can do with it.

Copyright 2009 C. Thomas
a.k.a. brownsugatou

When will the the violence stop? In these hard economic times a better question might be when will the madness stop? When will we start having hope and faith again? Entire families are being eradicated in the form of senseless killings. Innocent bystanders, men in blue, immigrants - the latest headlines. While the old "violent" headlines remain the same - war and no peace in the Middle East and on these streets. Yes, times are tough but where is the hope, where is the faith, what about trying to keep it together? I remember patiently standing in the free cheese line, free peanut butter line, food stamp line, check cashing line, and yes the line of hope and faith. I'm still here and I didn't have the greatest begininngs. And yes, then I was somebody's child - brown skinned, kinky hair, ponytails, Angela Davis gap, and yep grilled cheese and peanut butter cookies made me thick around these hips. But never mind all that, I AM somebody's child.

My son: "Mama, an earring + an earring = a diamond. And a chair + a chair = a sofa."
Me: "Where did you learn that from son?"
My son: "My brain tells me that's object math mama."

Now I know children say the darndest things, however when my son hit me up with his version of "object math" I literally had to stop in my tracks and was rendered speechless. I'm still trying to wrap my head around his wonderful logical thinking - and I am not being sarcastic here. I was truly stumped. At six years old, he already has the concept of seeing "the bigger picture down to a mathematical science." That's my son and I enjoy every single "morsel" of time that God has allowed us to share with each other as tomorrow is not always promised. All of this leads me to my next poem that was inspired by my son - and his siblings/my babies who are no longer with us - Ben, Ali, and the Three Angel Babies. My son was born prematurely at 29 weeks and weighed 2.5 lbs. He survived some amazing, amazing, challenges including facing death . More on this in another post.

This poem is about a lot of things rolled into one - "motherhood", relationships, freedom of choice (although I think differently now), and most importantly "life". See I didn't know about "life" until God introduced me to "motherhood".

Brown Suga Baby

My Brown Suga Baby,How did you come to be?
Out of the five, you all the way “live”.
See the first two, I deleted.
Because it was about what I
Was going through.College, socializin’, partyin’, and
The men: a.k.a. their effed up daddies.
I was aimlessly trying to figure out life
But I didn’t know “life”.

The third (it came in twos).
I thought I was on my way.
Coporate hoe, making dough,
Relationship tight, the timing was right.
I was ready for “cuddly-coo” and “peek-a-boo” conversations.
But I wasn’t ready for the storm
That God sent me through.
Your twin brothers, all they ever knew was love.
But, during that sixth month
God called them to his Gates.

The fourth was a blur.
My soon to be Angel Baby created a new hope.
Her Daddy would be there in nine months to cut the rope.
But, like the first two before her,
She too would be nameless and faceless.
Not at the hands of man but at the hands of God

Then came you.
My little Brown Suga Baby.
You came out and hit me up on some
“Please believe it ‘ish!”
You are my pride and joy in this world
And it’s the fighter in you that lets me know that all things are possible.
My Brown Suga Baby,
So precious, so sweet
There is nothing greater in this world,
Than having you make my life complete


Rest In Peace,The Three Angels, Ben and Ali
© 2003 C. Thomas a.k.a. brownsugatou

Keeping it short and funky. Setting these words to music one day? - possibly. But this piece is based on a real life experience - my past relationship with a "local" underground hip hop artist. I've already shared "The First Ladies of Hip Hop". When I share with you another piece "My Black Man" you'll see how it all comes together.

Can I Love You and Hip Hop Too?

Can I love You and Hip Hop too?
Treasure your cloud of smoke
And withstand you not being you?
Can I love You and Hip Hop too?
Stand patiently by your dreams
And not ask what you can do for you?
Can I love You and Hip Hop too?
Walk invisibly in my footsteps
And watch my soles become you?
Can I love You and Hip Hop too?

© 2009 C. Thomas a.k.a. brownsugatou