brownsugatou

What Happened To Me?

I used to be WHOLEHEARTEDLY supported

By DYSFUNCTIONALISM - that’s my fam!

And, yes I still give a damn.

Had my ear to the streets, BEEF,

Love/Love-me-not, knowledge and wisdom.

My heart used to beat box to the

Tune of yours, ours, with OTHERS.

I was quiet, COOL, calm, and

COMPASSIONATE.

What happened to me?

In this new shit - my new ENVIRONMENT,

Class, "face", and race are more

Important than your generosity

And your POTENTIAL for greatness.

I let it BEAT me down.

I now question GOD about

Who’s showing up in my life?
(Audacity at its worse.)

When the toughest challenge

Is finding my CAST in HIS haystack.

What happened to me?

Seriously what HAPPENED to ME?

I spent seven years NOT taking

A hard look at MYSELF.

And I spent SEVEN years NOT

Reaching back, NOT giving back,

And NOT looking back (word to Lauryn)

To the EVIRONMENT

That shaped the UNBREAKABLE me -

That I used to KNOW.

What happened to ME?

Saturday, July 24, 2010 Posted in | self-esteem, self-realization | 5 Comments »

Without He

In a world without He,

Who'd roam the cells of

My thick brown skin,

With those sexy eyes,

Over and over again?

In a world without He,

Who'd gaze at me covertly

As I delicately Picasso my lips...

Mmmmm imagine us interlocked

In a honey brown kiss.

In a world without He,

Who'd mentally rip off my

Baggy grey sweats and

Visualize my soft brown thighs?

The accent of my curvaceous hips?

While entertaining thoughts of my

Sweet potatoe pie?

In a world without He,

Who'd explore the joys of

Karma Sutra with me?

Or the physical pleasure

Of procreating with me?

In a world without He...

I'd lament, cry foul,

And become recklessly weak...

I could never conceive of my

Feminine world remaining

Balanced without He.

Sunday, July 18, 2010 Posted in | beautiful black woman, black man, love | 5 Comments »

My uncle sent me a version of this heartfelt message a few minutes ago. Yep, it made me look. Made me think about some amends that I can fine tune in my life. What about you? That friend that calls you more often than you call them, not saying I love you to those that don't hear it enough (its never enough), and just not simply sharing yourself with others. You never know who needs a hug or a hello or who may benefit from your kind words... from your spoken word or poetry. Don't hide love. Read. Read and Share. Read, Share and take Action.

I don't know who the author is but if anyone can shed some light on the origins of this message, please let me know. However, I found this version on the internet by doing a Google search.

"Life is important, Love is important, Tomorrow is

never promised..........

One day a woman's husband died, and on that clear, cold

morning, in the warmth of their bedroom, the wife was

struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't

"anymore". No more hugs, no more special moments to

celebrate together, no more phone calls just to chat, no more

‘just one minute..’ Sometimes, what we care about the most

gets all used up and goes away, never to return before we

can say good-bye, and say ‘I love you.’

So while we have it, it's best we love it, care for it, fix it when

it's broken and heal it when it's sick. This is true for

marriage......And old cars... And children with bad report

cards, and dogs with bad hips, and aging parents and

grandparents. We keep them because they are worth it,

because we are worth it.

Some things we keep -- like a best friend who moved away

or a close friend after divorce. There are just some things

that make us happy, no matter what.

Life is important, like people we know who are special, and

so we keep them close!

I received this from someone who thought I was a 'keeper'!

Then I sent it to the people I think of in the same way. Now

it's your turn to send this to all those people who are

"keepers" in your life, including the person who sent it, if

you feel that way. Suppose one morning you never wake

up. Do all your friends and family know you love them?

I was thinking...I could die today, tomorrow or next week,

and I wondered if I had any wounds needing to be healed,

relationships that needed rekindling, those three words

needing to be said.

Let every one of your friends and family know you love

them. Even if you think they don't love you back, you

would be amazed at what those three little words and a

smile can do. And just in case I'm gone tomorrow....

I LOVE YOU !!

Live today because tomorrow is not promised …"

Saturday, July 17, 2010 Posted in | don't hide love, love | 1 Comments »

Natalie "The Floacist" Stewart

Yep, that Floacist! One half of the duo that makes up Floetry with Marsha Ambrosious (the Songstress). (Floetic, Flo'ology) She's now embarking on her own solo career. Why not share in her new artistic journey.... listen and download. This was previously shared on Twitter by someone on twitter, so I'm most definitely NOT taking the credit for this one. Please enjoy!

Friday, July 16, 2010 Posted in | Floetry. The Floacist, music | 0 Comments »

Bishop Walter Hawkins, 1949 - 2010

I remember when my late grandmother use to sing this song - Sunday morning/Sunday afternoon, hot kitchen, yellow painted walls, food on the stove... "If anybody asks you, where I'm going? Where I'm goooing, soooon.." R.I.P. Bishop Walter Hawkins.

Biography of Dr. Walter Hawkins from Love Center Ministries, Inc in Oakland, CA.

Sunday, July 11, 2010 Posted in | Bishop Walter Hawkins, gospel, gospel singers | 0 Comments »

Writing Prompts: I Just Suck

Okay, so while I am being patient with inspiration I decided to try one (well two) of those writing prompts and share with the world. Sometimes my ish just stinks but, my offline friends know that I'm the master of laughing at my shortcomings. These two prompts are from a website called "The Journal". The first poetry prompt was to write an Anaphora poem. "An Anaphora is "the repetition of a word or expression several times within a clause or within a paragraph". In poetry the repetition of the phrase can be just at the beginning of each line, setting the tone as a meditation or a mantra, or it can be utilized more subtlety within the poem. The poem can be free verse or prose style." This is what I came up with... I have to admit that I wasn't quite impressed at all as this untitled piece came off as more like a call and response piece.

I say I’m damaged goods,

(Damaged goods)

But I’m not for sale,

(No not for sale).

I was just clearing my throat…

While you embezzled my hope.

Actin’ like ya shit don’t stink.

Your love, loves back

Like a dead mink.

I say I’m damaged goods,

(Damaged goods)

But I’m not for sale,

(No not for sale)

You’re damaged goods

(Damaged goods)

Oh what a sale!

(What a sale!)

Sittin’ on the clearance rack

(Clearance rack)

You guessed it,

60 percent off

‘Cause your love is so wack!

This was more like having fun at being wack, but at the same time I was getting my "release" on. We can all relate to being "damaged goods", however I somewhat missed the mark here and created a corny chrous. I hate the feeling of attempting to write a poem that ends up with five different tree branches - basically I have to put more effort and discipline into sticking to the theme of the poem as well as engaging the readers.

The second poetry prompt, was to write a free verse poem using "sparrows". *Sighs* I cheated and used the singular word sparrow - *Shaking my head.* And, I don't know, sometimes I believe having lived with an underground dirt hustler (underground rapper who manufactures his own shit) in my past, I just can't hide the influence even when it sucks.

The vision of my future - so narrow.

Even when my grip is unclenched,

Pendulum swingin’ from this arrow,

I’m gone master this shit -

Raw turbulence can’t obliterate the

Momentum of this sparrow...

Stop the presses, I'm done! I've learned what I've always known - that I express myself better when I write what I truly feel. I'm a rookie poet, but I know I'm not alone here. To be confined by someone else's predetermined space and theme is still a challenge for me. No need to elaborate... this is for the rookie poets out there, I'm still trying.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010 Posted in | poetry, writing prompts | 3 Comments »

"A Missed-educated Fan"

I'm still enjoying (and creating a new blog) during this 4 day weekend. This is a link to my latest blog "A Missed-educated Fan", my ode to the many talents of Lauryn Hill and her return - no matter how long it takes.

"The Missed-educated Fan"

Monday, July 5, 2010 Posted in | Lauryn Hill, The Miss-educated | 0 Comments »

Brutha Video - "Can't Get Enough"

I always wondered what happened to this group after their brief series on BET. Brutha can sing to me anytime...

Sunday, July 4, 2010 Posted in | Brutha, Can't Get Enough, Sex | 0 Comments »

BBQ BLUES & RULES: DON'T START NONE & IT WON'T BE NONE...

1. Drink responsibly, drive sober, and take somebody's keys away if need be.

2. Mind your own business: someone else's infidelity, poor cooking, bad ass kids and child discipline skills are NOT your demons. Just leave it alone!!!

3. On some days, your ish does stink, so bringing just yourself and empty hands to the BBQ is FOUL - stay home, watch a re-run of the BET Awards and channel Chris Brown - "I promise I won't let y'all down again."

4. Focus, focus, focus! Checking out the scene with one eye half way open & snickering in the moment for no apparent reason, while saying grace over the ribs is foul too. Think - choking on an unblessed rib vs. licking BBQ sauce off your fingers with a peace of mind? Sorry, Allstate don't have ya' back here!

5. And last but not least embrace without reservation! - If Grannie's hair is dyed jet blue, Uncle Peanut is diggin' an alternate lifestyle, there's a sudden Kool-Aid shortage, Aunt Pam is creeping like a cougar and cousin Tammy is throwin' tofu on the grill - just shut up and thank God for the opportunity to share in their experiences.

Happy 4th of July ya'll! I'll let Tony Toni Tone close out my very brief rant with "The Blues". brownsugatou wants you to spend time with you too.... but please "be nice or leave."

Saturday, July 3, 2010 Posted in | Happy 4th of July, The Blues, Tony Toni Tone | 0 Comments »

REDEMPTION????

Did Siedah Garrett write the song, "Man In The Mirror" specifically for a boy named Chris Brown or what?

This video has been removed due to copyright laws. brown ;-)

Monday, June 28, 2010 Posted in | Chris Brown, man in the mirror, Michael Jackson | 0 Comments »

ACKNOWLEDGING THE MELTING POT

If you scroll waaaaaaay to the bottom of my blog you'll see the Feedjit Widget which I've dubbed the Melting Pot. The Feedjit Widget tracks the location of all visitors who visit my blog. My website traffic is always in the slow lane, however that is not why I blog. I've mentioned before that I was grateful to have had only ONE admirer (non other than Mr. Mac Walton, R.I.P.) of my blog when I first got started. That one admirer is the reason why I keep blogging and keep writing. New bloggers don't give up. But today I wanted to say THANK YOU and send some viral hugs to the people who follow brownsugatou and stop by to visit. It's not about the quantity of blog traffic, but the quality of the... ahhhhh, you finish the cliche. Thank you. ;;))

Sunday, June 27, 2010 Posted in | appreciate blog readers, blog traffic, blog visitors | 1 Comments »

Michael Joseph Jackson

I wrote and posted this poem last year...

"The Gloved One... A Loved One"

You still bad.

The whole world is mourning you,

Like you were ALL we had.

Yeah, the music died yesterday,

And was resurrected by memories

That you gave.

The 60's, 70's, 80's....

New millennium, infinity.

The Blueprint for music videos -

You authored.

A pied piper of music for many generations,

You got my grannie through, pulled my mama through,

Me through...

And now my six year old is rockin' with you too.

You taught us that being black

AND eclectic was a perfect match.

Struggle with a class act -

Mmmmm... you authored that too.

A lil' man wearin' James Brown's shoes

ABC'in and tweet, tweet, tweetin'.

Out of the J-Five,

YOU were all the way live!

The super fro, the jheri curl,

The uncurled curl, and those

Sequinned suits....

And yes...

The Moonwalk

And

The Glove.

Now try to trademark or copyright that!

We devoured it all Mike.

So, am I selfish when I say

50 years was not enough?

Shit, 30+ years (my time)

Of being in a

Michael Joseph Jackson

Musically induced coma

WILL make you stop thinking

Outside yourself...

Especially when it was just

US...

and

YOUR RHYTHM,

... and now you're at peace.

C. Thomas a.k.a. brownsugatou

Friday, June 25, 2010 Posted in | Michael Jackson Poem, Michael Jackson's death | 0 Comments »

Lauryn Hill - Ooh La La La (Live at Harmony Festival 2010)

Monday, June 21, 2010 Posted in | Harmony Music Festival, Lauryn Hill | 0 Comments »

Scarred

On this Father's Day,

As I look at the reflection in my mirror,

My confident image poses uncomfortably.

Each year I'm reminded that I'm scarred.

And nothing can make up for being scarred.

I was just a living accessory to your hate - her.

And innocently guilty of what I knew - love.

Divorced parents - he walked and stayed absent.

A victim of love? Label me that too.

But I'm the wannabe architect of love,

Shared between a man and a woman,

With a hole in my soul

That bears your resemblance - Daddy.

So, I'll just continue to suck it up, not fuck it up.

And learn to give and demand better - love.

Scarred.

brownsugatou

Sunday, June 20, 2010 Posted in | absent parents, fatherless girls | 0 Comments »

Lonely...

Wets you with an ancient tidal wave of pain,

Kisses you with a fresh hint of solitude,

And leaves you pan handling for a hug.

brownsugatou

Posted in | lonely, poems about loneliness | 0 Comments »

Gil Scott-Heron - "I'm New Here"

Saturday, June 19, 2010 Posted in | Gil Scott-Heron, I'm New Here, live spoken word, poetry | 1 Comments »

Pac The Poet: HAPPY BIRTHDAY

This post has been edited to include one of the first poems that I read by Tupac - "The Rose That Grew From The Concrete". ... "Funny it seems, but by keeping it's dreams..."

Did you hear about the rose that grew

from a crack in the concrete?

Proving nature's law is wrong it

learned to walk with out having feet.

Funny it seems, but by keeping it's dreams,

it learned to breathe fresh air.

Long live the rose that grew from concrete

when no one else ever cared.

by Tupac Shakur

Wednesday, June 16, 2010 Posted in | Tupac Shakur | 1 Comments »

Poet: CJ Suitt

Each one teach one.
Poet's mission is fueled by passion

Newspaper: Entertainment - News Observer.com

Sunday, June 13, 2010 Posted in | CJ Suitt, live spoken word, poet, poetry | 0 Comments »

Is My Black Not Beautiful?

Wow.... I am still at odds with my own thoughts on this video (see below) from cnn.com about the controversial pictures of supermodel Claudia Schiffer in "blackface" (a style of entertainment that was historically popular in minstrel shows used to perpetuate black stereotypes). The photos were taken in 2007 by celebrity designer Karl Largerfield and published in British magazine Stern Fotographie. When I saw the pictures I didn't get the impression that Carl Largefield's intent was to stereotype black women, thus I have to agree with super model Roshumba Williams comments - it's artistic. HOWEVER, I do have an issue with Claudia's skin being slightly darkened. How come she just couldn't rock the afro puff and celebrate the glory of a sista's natural hair? I've always wondered why its acceptable for black women to purchase straight beautiful looking hair but we don't see white women walking around this earth with afro puffs or anything that emulates black women's hairstyles? Is my black not beautiful? I'm a proud nappy headed wearing black woman. The women in my family have historically worn wigs and weaves. Take notice of my lack of criticism in regards to black women wearing weaves. It's just disturbing that the acceptance of black people's natural looks are so underrated. Racism is the biggest doo doo stain that never left America. And it's even more disturbing that our society still can't accept themselves either. "Pimp My Body" (plastic surgery, face lifts, long held standards of beauty, etc) is a mentality and another doo doo stain that will never leave America also. Is my black not beautiful? Are you not beautiful?

Saturday, June 12, 2010 Posted in | blackface, natural looks, racism | 0 Comments »

Out of Love

The words I want to express

Are chained to a rusty lock,

Quieted by your

Childish games -

And disregarded by

The petty actions

Of those other names

When I step in love,

You call it disdain.

When I act for us,

I’m a selfish

WMD.

Cliché…

I go left,

You go right.

But out of love,

I patiently wait for

You to recognize the

The stupidity of your reflection…

‘Cause, its out of love...

That I accept the beauty in your reflection.

brownsugatou

Sunday, June 6, 2010 Posted in | brownsugatou, look in the mirror, love, man in the mirror, poetry | 2 Comments »

Unmarried Suicide: A Short Poem

There’s a King somewhere

Alone, woman-starved and

In a constant mental funk.

Married to his own love gluttony

Committing a slow suicide…

There‘s a Queen somewhere…

Pregnant with selfish.

Abandoned, companionless.

Mated to family, work, & friends,

Committing a slow suicide…

brownsugatou

Saturday, June 5, 2010 Posted in | poetry, unmarried | 0 Comments »

CafePress: brownsugatou t-shirts

Just expanding a little bit here. But I've finally opened up a Cafe Press store. Here you'll find brownsugatou t-shirts along with quotes from my collection of poems. I currently have available a basic brownsugatou t-shirts and a shirt with a quote from the poem I recently wrote "L-O-V-E Arithmetic". Below is the link to the CafePress shop and in the meantime I'll keep putting my P.O.D. designing skills to build on the selections.

I love you Friday... blessings!

Come visit my store on CafePress!

Friday, June 4, 2010 Posted in | brownsugatou, CafePress, t-shirts | 0 Comments »

Poet seeks BP Gulf oil spill poetry to feature in column

Sunday, May 30, 2010 Posted in | BP Gulf oil spill, poetry, seeking poets | 0 Comments »

"Poetry" by P.Dot

I'm posting this video on both of my blogs.... the notebook is synonymous with both of my loves... hip hop and poetry. Check out this new artist, P. Dot and his video entitled "Poetry".

Saturday, May 29, 2010 Posted in | hip hop, P. Dot, poetry | 0 Comments »

For Joe N. Mays: L-O-V-E Arithmetic

*This piece was written earlier this evening

upon request...

The harder I love,

The dumber you get.

This is not rocket science,

But L-O-V-E

Arithmetic.

I didn’t divide me.

I uncovered my soul

And gave you

Two halves of me.

Do the math.

When I committed to our love,

I gave you one fourth faith,

One fourth honesty,

One fourth honor,

And one fourth trust.

But I nourished the

Whole of our being.

While you viciously

Widened the circumference

Of the hole in my heart.

Yep,

I was a sucker...

But now I’m doing the math.

Statistics indicate

That I should stay.

Although I’m expected to go

And make those numbers grow.

Part of my heart remembers

Half of the good years

And half of the great times.

Divided.

I sometimes long to

Be near you.

Caress you and

Kiss you

Softly until my body

Trembles at the thought of

Losing you.

Or losing it -

Exponential carnal desires

For your flesh?

No.

Instead of loving a part of you,

And hurting all of me,

I’m walking away from

The whole you -

Sadly, a part of me too.

Do the math.

The harder I loved,

The dumber you got - about love.

It wasn’t rocket science,

But L-O-V-E

Arithmetic.

brownsugatou

Friday, May 28, 2010 Posted in | "black poetry", black love poems, breaking up | 2 Comments »

Fearless In Flip Flops

Fearless In Flip Flops

Short and brown

With an unmatched beanstalk demeanor.

Ashy legs, lacking Vaseline Sunscreen

Owned by a skinny lil’ dude with

Worn flip flops on his feet.

Fearlessly he overtakes the pavement

The grass and sand dunes.

He’s Hannibal on his scooter.

Flip flops on his ashy feet

Climbing, running, falling

Running, falling, climbing

Falling, climbing running

The hot climate melts fire.

His forehead bleeds sweat,

But his breathing & yelling

Sing a joyful noise

“Tag you it!”

Flip flops on his ashy feet

Climbing, running, falling

Running, falling, climbing

Falling, climbing running

“Hey mama, I’m over here!”

He waves from the highest peak

Of his Mt. Everest

Made of steel, plastic,

Shaky wooden bridges, and squeaky swings.

He’s climbed it a zillion times.

Flip flops on his tired ashy feet.

Climbing, running, falling

Running, falling, climbing

Falling, climbing running…

I’ll never forget,

The summers that you played

Fearlessly with flip flops

On your ashy little feet.

brownsugatou

Tuesday, May 25, 2010 Posted in | kids, poetry, summer | 0 Comments »

NU EDUTAINMENT FILMS PRESENTS...HONOR YOUR MOTHER

Friday, May 14, 2010 Posted in | | 0 Comments »

Where Is Poetry?

Where is Poetry?

Months ago you used to be so close to me.

We used to hang tight, late at night with

the Mighty Pen

And Weathered Notebook.

Up to no good, consuming old thoughts

About my old hood, juggling metaphors,

Hard rhymes and similes.

Now it’s like we are best friends who

Don’t communicate anymore,

But find the comfort of solitude a bit more soothing.

Where is Poetry?

Dedicated to Guru & Gang Starr's Legacy

Monday, May 3, 2010 Posted in | african american poetry, Gang Starr, Guru | 2 Comments »

@fatbellybella ... her latest

ERYKAH BADU - Turn Me Away (Get MuNNY)

I usually don't (post lyrics)... but poetry is a song, is lyrics, is hip hop, it is the cloudy or organized alphabet that makes love to our ears. Enjoy your Munny honey! brown ;-)

Get Munny [4x]

Can't turn me away

I believe in your heart

I'll always want to stay [2x]

Eww can't lie to you honey

I just want your money

Hi answer me Munny

Don't run from me trying to

Get away just stay ok

Cause Munny I want you back

La la la la

I look like a model

I'll do what I gotta do

to stay in the running cause I want your money

Give me some

I'll be the one back stage

cause Munny I want you back

La la la la

Can't turn me away

I believe in your heart

I'll always want to stay [4x]

I'll wait on your doorstep

Till you let me come in

Hey I'll be your best friend

Say Munny can you come out and

play I'll stay or I'll come back

Cause Munny I want you back

La la la la

Fresher than the others

I'll cook like your Mother

I I'll bring the honey

You just bring the money

Fingers crossed behind my back

Cause Munny I want you back

La la la la

Can't turn me away

I believe in your heart

I'll always want to stay [4x]

Jewels Cars and Candy Clothes

Electric garden hose

Down to the minerals

Tickle tickle before stroke

I love your solid golds

I love your pearly ball

You know that I am still

just how you want to feel

Ewww uh oh

Dropped your mind

Scooped it up

Put it in my sock

I'll be your robot girl

Come into me my world

I will wait

Ewww weee boy

let me drop ya off

I'm your predator hey

Cause Munny I want you back

La la la la

Can't turn me away

I believe in your heart

I'll always want to stay [4x]

Sunday, May 2, 2010 Posted in | Erykah Badu, Turn Me Away (Get Munny) | 2 Comments »

Aretha Franklin: "Amazing Grace"

"Amazing Grace", Aretha Franklin's best selling musical project ever is finally being turned into a concert film. I have purchased the CD twice, and the first time I was going through some hard times... Aretha's version of "Old Landmark" saved me and still gives me chills when I hear her "sang it!". See my poem "Brown Suga Baby". Anyway, I am glad Sydney Pollack documented the recording of "Amazing Grace"... if it is the last movie I go see or the last DVD I ever purchase... I have lived! Here's the trailer.(The CD also features sermons from Aretha Franklin's late father, the Rev. C.L. Franklin - I am also hoping there is footage of him included in the film.)

Sunday, April 18, 2010 Posted in | Amazing Grace Film Trailer with Aretha Franklin, Amazing Grace Movie, Aretha Franklin, Sydney Pollack | 4 Comments »

I LOVE YOU FRIDAY!!!

You can't deny that the lyrics are poetically beautiful. I've always considered this my summer love song... it's so gentle, and puts me in a content and loving mood.

I love you Friday! Send some love back.... ;-)

Friday, April 9, 2010 Posted in | For The Love Of You, Isley Brothers, R and B Classics | 0 Comments »

15 Minutes

15 minutes.

I got 15 minutes
To relax, de-stress,
Unpack my mind
And clean out the closets
Of clothes that
Are not mine...

I hide away for 15 minutes.

Stories, issues, and damp tissues,
Unnwillingly connect with me.
So for 9 hours each day
I "absorb" you.
But I find solace in 15 minutes.

15 minutes.

Saturday, April 3, 2010 Posted in | | 0 Comments »

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